Judgment without accountability
By Kevin Jacobs 2007-02-22
GCW's trademark column is a comprehensive review of the entire active roster. Written by a different anonymous contributor each week, Unique Critique is the most honest assessment of each member's performance you can find. The commentary ranges from complimentary to mercilessly cruel, so if you can't handle it, don't read on! But if you want to know how each roster member stacks up in the eyes of one writer, Unique Critique offers you the chance.
-Mediocre -Average -Good -Great -World Class
This Week: In this edition of the Unique Critique, your author appraises the prospects of each competitor in the Rampage field. This time, we won’t be looking at every aspect of handlers’ contributions to GCW, though – because match writing, posers, web design and so on won’t win you the Rampage Tournament! Instead, the star ratings are based primarily on roleplays, and secondarily on segments, reflecting what it takes to come out on top at Rampage in five shows’ time.
Shaman
Seed: 16
What defines Shaman is his consistency. Unfortunately, he performs consistently at a level below the best entrants in this tournament. If Shaman is to succeed in the Rampage Tournament and defy his status as bottom seed, the veteran is going to have to step out of his comfort zone and really work hard, not on quantity, but on that most elusive of goals: genuine writing quality.
Slash
Seed: 15
Slash has flown under the radar so far, but he’s clearly keen to work hard. His Road to Rampage segment was clever, and he’s also roleplayed a couple of times in JUST Wrestling, which shows he’s keen and committed to developing his character. Nonetheless, his writing isn’t as tight as that of others, and he has a mountain to climb to win this tournament.
Lori Equinox
Seed: 14
It was nice to see Equinox return at Shockwave after taking a shard of glass in the eye at NC-17, but one wonders whether the handler is making the best decisions. He’s just introduced a new character, Matt Richter, whose work so far has been short of the required standard, and it remains to be seen whether Richter will remain alongside Equinox or disappear as soon as he appeared. Equinox is the better developed character, but his chief enemy could be an inability to focus. If you want to win Rampage, your focus must be unparalleled.
Dead Cool
Seed: 13
This is another who spreads himself thin. He’s contributed an enormous amount of man-hours in terms of poser work, and is unquestionably already an important part of the GCW family, but at the end of the day your character is paramount. And right now, the character is lacking. We’ve seen flashes of an interesting back story, but we need far more material to get our teeth into.
Phil Atken
Seed: 12
After a series of false starts in GCW, it looks like Phil Atken is finally here to stay. But no sooner has he quelled his wanderlust than he’s lost his niche. It’s not clear whether Phil Atken knows exactly what he wants to be in GCW, and though he got given an easy ride by the writer of the Rampage Royal, it looks like the character just needs some edge to him. It’s a classic case of a good writer with an underdeveloped character; if Atken finds his angle, he’ll be a fearsome proposition.
Normal John Johnson
Seed: 11
It’s now well established that Johnson is a former JUST Wrestling Champion, but that means nothing when you come and eat at the grown-ups’ table. So far, Johnson has polarised opinion, with some enjoying his segments and others slating them. He placed the lowest of all the Road to Rampage segments, suggesting that his approach to the tournament may have been poorly thought through, but on the roleplay board he can hang with anyone. It’s just a question of whether he can give the same devotion to GCW that he has to other places.
Bryan Mayhem
Seed: 10
Mayhem is something of a GCW legend by now, and he’s been getting plenty of love on the boards. But I wonder whether his roleplays really give enough to compete with the higher seeds in this tournament. There’s an argument that the Hardcore Champion has had an easy ride of it lately, and if he doesn’t step up his game for Rampage, he might just get found out.
The Magnificent Messiah
Seed: 9
We haven’t seen a great deal of the Messiah, but what we have seen has been promising. A more consistent dedication to doing his best will certainly go some way towards him upsetting the bigger names in this tournament. The question is, does he believe in himself? To win a tournament this packed with talent, belief is a prerequisite.
AXEL Action
Seed: 8
Fresh off several months of demanding, and subsequently losing, a string of US title matches, AXEL Action has a lot to prove. Despite rumours circulating for the past year that Action is to be pushed to the main event, he has lost a lot of matches, and was recently revealed to be ranked among the bottom five wrestlers in the whole of PTC in the official interfed rankings. Yet many argue that AXEL’s unparalleled desire made him a favourite for Rampage long before the seedings were allocated. This tournament without question is the acid test for AXEL Action: will he sink or will he swim?
Triumph Frost
Seed: 7
He’s been neglected as one of the coming forces in GCW, perhaps due to the overwhelming success of Rasa. But Frost has a dangerous mouth and even better fists – promising roleplays and even better segments - and the youngster must have a strong chance of making waves. If not in Rampage, then certainly in the Hardcore division.
SurReal
Seed: 6
Recent tussles with Tempest have emasculated the Northern Ireland technician, but the veteran is the very definition of solid, and his no-nonsense style will see him take no prisoners in this tournament. A reliable worker, the only question mark concerns attention to detail; though the dialogue and story are usually good, the roleplays are not always the clearest of reads.
David Spencer
Seed: 5
Another one who’s absolutely nailed on for the Hardcore division, especially after that punishing Rampage Royal performance. I think he might have been better off retaining the Face moniker; if he’s David Spencer, the mask’s not exactly hiding a lot. But what’s indisputable is that on his return he’s already built up more steam than he had first time around. For whatever reason, he’s got more buzz than most on this roster, and a Rampage Tournament victory is certainly within the realms of possibility. His roleplays might have to go a little further than they used to, though.
PAZUZU, THE DARKNESS
Seed: 4
The final four of the Rampage Royal is practically inseparable. PAZUZU in fact came top of the roleplay scoring, and if roleplays had been weighed higher than segments, as I believe they should have been, he would be seeded even higher. Make no mistake, the PAZUZ has stepped it up several gears over the last few weeks, and the attention diverted to Rasa, Shipley and Spencer might be causing some to overlook this. Do so at your peril.
Tempest
Seed: 3
The days of shows filled with a dozen happy-go-lucky Tempest segments are long gone, replaced by an increasingly clinical focus. She’s won her war with SurReal, and perhaps with PAZUZU too, but if the two meet again in this tournament, expect sparks to fly. The Television Champion will surely make it to the semi-finals – but once there, will she have the cutting edge of a PAZUZU? Time will tell; that is a step she needs to take if she wants to win this tournament.
Rasa
Seed: 2
Rasa has come out of nowhere to snag the #2 seed, and has generated an enormous amount of buzz. The only question surrounds its longevity. The roleplays so far have given simple messages about the character, laid out in cutting prose beneath the banners of classic songs. The handler is unlikely to run out of classic songs to use, but will he/she run out of simple messages about the character before a viable storyline suggests itself? Everyone else in this tournament needs to hope so.
Tim Shipley
Seed: 1
It seems crazy to think that a few months ago, GCW hadn’t heard of Tim Shipley. He came into our world as the prospective Commissioner, and though he was swerved out of that role, quickly installed himself as an obnoxious heel presence. Not many are able to waltz into GCW and immediately begin feuding with the longest reigning Heavyweight Champion of all time, but so far Shipley looks like backing that up. The question-mark lies over whether the roleplays can be as successful when Shipley himself plays the starring role – but it’s a small question-mark, because the segments have been equally good.
So - who will win the Rampage Tournament? This year, there's arguably more talent in it than ever before. Some say it's wide open. Others say it's one of a group of four or five. This column says PAZUZU, THE DARKNESS.
By Kevin Jacobs 2007-02-22
GCW's trademark column is a comprehensive review of the entire active roster. Written by a different anonymous contributor each week, Unique Critique is the most honest assessment of each member's performance you can find. The commentary ranges from complimentary to mercilessly cruel, so if you can't handle it, don't read on! But if you want to know how each roster member stacks up in the eyes of one writer, Unique Critique offers you the chance.
-Mediocre -Average -Good -Great -World ClassThis Week: In this edition of the Unique Critique, your author appraises the prospects of each competitor in the Rampage field. This time, we won’t be looking at every aspect of handlers’ contributions to GCW, though – because match writing, posers, web design and so on won’t win you the Rampage Tournament! Instead, the star ratings are based primarily on roleplays, and secondarily on segments, reflecting what it takes to come out on top at Rampage in five shows’ time.
Shaman
Seed: 16
What defines Shaman is his consistency. Unfortunately, he performs consistently at a level below the best entrants in this tournament. If Shaman is to succeed in the Rampage Tournament and defy his status as bottom seed, the veteran is going to have to step out of his comfort zone and really work hard, not on quantity, but on that most elusive of goals: genuine writing quality.
Slash
Seed: 15
Slash has flown under the radar so far, but he’s clearly keen to work hard. His Road to Rampage segment was clever, and he’s also roleplayed a couple of times in JUST Wrestling, which shows he’s keen and committed to developing his character. Nonetheless, his writing isn’t as tight as that of others, and he has a mountain to climb to win this tournament.
Lori Equinox
Seed: 14
It was nice to see Equinox return at Shockwave after taking a shard of glass in the eye at NC-17, but one wonders whether the handler is making the best decisions. He’s just introduced a new character, Matt Richter, whose work so far has been short of the required standard, and it remains to be seen whether Richter will remain alongside Equinox or disappear as soon as he appeared. Equinox is the better developed character, but his chief enemy could be an inability to focus. If you want to win Rampage, your focus must be unparalleled.
Dead Cool
Seed: 13
This is another who spreads himself thin. He’s contributed an enormous amount of man-hours in terms of poser work, and is unquestionably already an important part of the GCW family, but at the end of the day your character is paramount. And right now, the character is lacking. We’ve seen flashes of an interesting back story, but we need far more material to get our teeth into.
Phil Atken
Seed: 12
After a series of false starts in GCW, it looks like Phil Atken is finally here to stay. But no sooner has he quelled his wanderlust than he’s lost his niche. It’s not clear whether Phil Atken knows exactly what he wants to be in GCW, and though he got given an easy ride by the writer of the Rampage Royal, it looks like the character just needs some edge to him. It’s a classic case of a good writer with an underdeveloped character; if Atken finds his angle, he’ll be a fearsome proposition.
Normal John Johnson
Seed: 11
It’s now well established that Johnson is a former JUST Wrestling Champion, but that means nothing when you come and eat at the grown-ups’ table. So far, Johnson has polarised opinion, with some enjoying his segments and others slating them. He placed the lowest of all the Road to Rampage segments, suggesting that his approach to the tournament may have been poorly thought through, but on the roleplay board he can hang with anyone. It’s just a question of whether he can give the same devotion to GCW that he has to other places.
Bryan Mayhem
Seed: 10
Mayhem is something of a GCW legend by now, and he’s been getting plenty of love on the boards. But I wonder whether his roleplays really give enough to compete with the higher seeds in this tournament. There’s an argument that the Hardcore Champion has had an easy ride of it lately, and if he doesn’t step up his game for Rampage, he might just get found out.
The Magnificent Messiah
Seed: 9
We haven’t seen a great deal of the Messiah, but what we have seen has been promising. A more consistent dedication to doing his best will certainly go some way towards him upsetting the bigger names in this tournament. The question is, does he believe in himself? To win a tournament this packed with talent, belief is a prerequisite.
AXEL Action
Seed: 8
Fresh off several months of demanding, and subsequently losing, a string of US title matches, AXEL Action has a lot to prove. Despite rumours circulating for the past year that Action is to be pushed to the main event, he has lost a lot of matches, and was recently revealed to be ranked among the bottom five wrestlers in the whole of PTC in the official interfed rankings. Yet many argue that AXEL’s unparalleled desire made him a favourite for Rampage long before the seedings were allocated. This tournament without question is the acid test for AXEL Action: will he sink or will he swim?
Triumph Frost
Seed: 7
He’s been neglected as one of the coming forces in GCW, perhaps due to the overwhelming success of Rasa. But Frost has a dangerous mouth and even better fists – promising roleplays and even better segments - and the youngster must have a strong chance of making waves. If not in Rampage, then certainly in the Hardcore division.
SurReal
Seed: 6
Recent tussles with Tempest have emasculated the Northern Ireland technician, but the veteran is the very definition of solid, and his no-nonsense style will see him take no prisoners in this tournament. A reliable worker, the only question mark concerns attention to detail; though the dialogue and story are usually good, the roleplays are not always the clearest of reads.
David Spencer
Seed: 5
Another one who’s absolutely nailed on for the Hardcore division, especially after that punishing Rampage Royal performance. I think he might have been better off retaining the Face moniker; if he’s David Spencer, the mask’s not exactly hiding a lot. But what’s indisputable is that on his return he’s already built up more steam than he had first time around. For whatever reason, he’s got more buzz than most on this roster, and a Rampage Tournament victory is certainly within the realms of possibility. His roleplays might have to go a little further than they used to, though.
PAZUZU, THE DARKNESS
Seed: 4
The final four of the Rampage Royal is practically inseparable. PAZUZU in fact came top of the roleplay scoring, and if roleplays had been weighed higher than segments, as I believe they should have been, he would be seeded even higher. Make no mistake, the PAZUZ has stepped it up several gears over the last few weeks, and the attention diverted to Rasa, Shipley and Spencer might be causing some to overlook this. Do so at your peril.
Tempest
Seed: 3
The days of shows filled with a dozen happy-go-lucky Tempest segments are long gone, replaced by an increasingly clinical focus. She’s won her war with SurReal, and perhaps with PAZUZU too, but if the two meet again in this tournament, expect sparks to fly. The Television Champion will surely make it to the semi-finals – but once there, will she have the cutting edge of a PAZUZU? Time will tell; that is a step she needs to take if she wants to win this tournament.
Rasa
Seed: 2
Rasa has come out of nowhere to snag the #2 seed, and has generated an enormous amount of buzz. The only question surrounds its longevity. The roleplays so far have given simple messages about the character, laid out in cutting prose beneath the banners of classic songs. The handler is unlikely to run out of classic songs to use, but will he/she run out of simple messages about the character before a viable storyline suggests itself? Everyone else in this tournament needs to hope so.
Tim Shipley
Seed: 1
It seems crazy to think that a few months ago, GCW hadn’t heard of Tim Shipley. He came into our world as the prospective Commissioner, and though he was swerved out of that role, quickly installed himself as an obnoxious heel presence. Not many are able to waltz into GCW and immediately begin feuding with the longest reigning Heavyweight Champion of all time, but so far Shipley looks like backing that up. The question-mark lies over whether the roleplays can be as successful when Shipley himself plays the starring role – but it’s a small question-mark, because the segments have been equally good.
So - who will win the Rampage Tournament? This year, there's arguably more talent in it than ever before. Some say it's wide open. Others say it's one of a group of four or five. This column says PAZUZU, THE DARKNESS.